Written June 4th,2010.
A Baby Today
I lost a baby today.
I stumble through the motions of life;
My body broken, my heart torn, my soul wounded.
I curl like a child on his lap and I sob.
Uncontrollable, gutwrenching; filled with the emptiness of my womb.
He holds me silent, words are of no comfort.
I feel the strength of his arms even as mine remain empty.
I lost a baby today.
A perfect baby boy with my name.
I’m empty. No tears fall.
Outward: strong for her.
Inward: loneliness to immense to bear.
His life so short, mine changed forever.
I feel my arms around her, this body so full of pain.
Broken and shattered; I feel alone.
We lost a baby today.
Our future unpredictable.
No laughter, no amazement, no baby to fill our lives.
Sadness instead.
This dream was but a moment, slipping away before our eyes.
A tiny body: perfect fingers, perfect toes, a perfect spirit.
Not meant for this world.
Each night a reminder.
Missing him terribly.
We feel alone; even as we are together.
Have we lost a baby today?
His life made perfect through the sacrifice divine.
Loneliness, broken hearts will heal.
Faith to carry us through.
An angel we have gained.
His precious body now joined with his pure soul.
With his Father and his Saviour.
Never to be alone.
Separate in mortality.
Bound in eternity.
Forever His arms encircle.
We feel peace.
I lost a baby today.
I stumble through the motions of life;
My body broken, my heart torn, my soul wounded.
I curl like a child on his lap and I sob.
Uncontrollable, gutwrenching; filled with the emptiness of my womb.
He holds me silent, words are of no comfort.
I feel the strength of his arms even as mine remain empty.
I lost a baby today.
A perfect baby boy with my name.
I’m empty. No tears fall.
Outward: strong for her.
Inward: loneliness to immense to bear.
His life so short, mine changed forever.
I feel my arms around her, this body so full of pain.
Broken and shattered; I feel alone.
We lost a baby today.
Our future unpredictable.
No laughter, no amazement, no baby to fill our lives.
Sadness instead.
This dream was but a moment, slipping away before our eyes.
A tiny body: perfect fingers, perfect toes, a perfect spirit.
Not meant for this world.
Each night a reminder.
Missing him terribly.
We feel alone; even as we are together.
Have we lost a baby today?
His life made perfect through the sacrifice divine.
Loneliness, broken hearts will heal.
Faith to carry us through.
An angel we have gained.
His precious body now joined with his pure soul.
With his Father and his Saviour.
Never to be alone.
Separate in mortality.
Bound in eternity.
Forever His arms encircle.
We feel peace.
That was beautiful. You have a talent for verbalizing expressing emotion. What a gift. Thank you for sharing. You are still in my thoughts and prayers everyday.
ReplyDeleteYou are very talented. Tears stream down my face as I think about things you have endured the last 5 years. And I am sure I don't even know the half of it. I wish so badly I could take this pain away. I can't even imagine what you feel inside. This poem describes it so well, but actually living it everyday I can't understand. We think about you guys often and are in our prayers.
ReplyDeleteStacey, we love you guys so much. I have a hard time reading this because of the things that we have been through in the past but it compares not to what you and Graham have been through. What a sweet poem to express the heartbreak and yet the joy all at the same time.
ReplyDeleteThat was so beautiful. Thank you. This is a reminder to me of how grateful I am to be a parent when my kids are fighting with each other and screaming and drawing with their crayons all over my kitchen table this morning. So thank you for reminding me what a blessing these children are.
ReplyDeleteYou guys have amazed us through this. You are such an example of so much faith and hope. We pray for and think of you often.
ReplyDeleteThat is truly beautiful. Haveing lost a baby as well, you described the feelings perfectly, where I never could put them into words myself. We are so sorry for your loss and all you've gone through. You are such a strength and example to all of us. We love you. We also pray for you and think of you often.
ReplyDeletep.s. Sorry that I spelled "having" wrong! :)
ReplyDeleteStacey that was beautiful. I am glad that you are writing again, you have a great talent. You and Graham are in our thoughts and prayers.
ReplyDelete